which one?

Should I pick looks and personality or cute and security. Should I pick the one that chooses brown or black? the 15 or 16 years old? The one that treats me like greatness or the one that treats me like a best friend? The one that I feel secure around or the one I can talk to about anything? The one that likes Soccer & football or Soccer and Basketball. The one that likes me when I wake up in the morning looking crappy and he doesn't care or the one that wants me to look my best all the time?   

I'm Reading.

Night. So far its pretty okay. Its not something I would choose to read on even though this was a life situation that happened, I really enjoyed how Anne Frank wrote her diary not really so much how this one is written. It kind of drifts off when its talking and explains everything in perfect detail making it boring once you get every detail in. Well, have to finish reading, but don't get me wrong this book is probably very important to us because it shows us how the holocaust was like in more detail. It is very sad though. I'm glad I wasn't alive during the holocaust.

Got Grounded

Yesterday, not a good day. First, I get flaked on. Then, I get grounded for asking a question. I'm like what the hec is going on with this world. I feel like my luck isn't going so well this year just as it was starting to get better it falls wayyyyy down like a rock . It's okay because things fall for a reason and now I just have to find the thing to lift up everything and put them back on their feet .

Saturday Flaker

My Best friend is the biggest flake ever. I never see her anymore because she always says she can't hang out at the last minute. Although she does this to me all the time I still hope to see her soon. Every single Saturday she asks me to hang out, I wait for her all day and yet nothing. I just need to finally realize that next saturday I'm not gonna wait for her I have to hang out with someone who won't just say they wanna hang out with me and never show up =/. 

Wat a monday.

Today was pretty funny. I went to Dance rehearsal and after I talked on the phone to wish my friend happy birthday since he's a man now.  Then as I am writing this I am on the phone with Daniel I was extremely tired but hopefully I can stay up since it was a surprise to get a phone call this late. Well thats my Monday for you guys.

My Sunday

Santa Cruz with the Family was so much fun. We even brought our doggy . We kinda always take her on our family trips though because she is part of our family. Anyways, went to tour UCSC and then we went on a walk. On our walk, there were a lot of dears I managed to get about 8 ft away for 2 of them and take really good pictures of them. Then we went to the Wharf and had dinner up there and went to Marini's for some real good Santa Cruz Freshly churned Ice Cream. Well, that was my Sunday.

comp.

I had comp on Saturday. I didn't win but I got 2nd place which I guess is alright in some peoples case. I just really have a competitive side when it comes to competitions. But its ok, winning isn't always everything its the experience that goes along with it. I also went through a really long process of something called a workshop. Its a long day of singing for 10 hours and then a performance in front of many people. WEll, that was my sat competition . 

First Love ?!?

So when I get the question about "my first love" I know the one guy I love but am not in love with .There is always mystery's behind the "love" word you never know at first but my first love's name is Christopher Joesph Kaul. I knew him since I was a wee little 9 year old. We didn't really talk though at that age I just really always saw him as "that kid" until I was 13. When we were 12 I noticed he was really cute, but I never thought things could go beyond friendship, but my thoughts really did change real quickly. 

It all started in 2007. Chris and my brother got really close.Although I didn't notice my dad told me Chris gave me the "I like you look..." I still don't know what that "look" is. Anyways, They became best friends and I couldn't help but notice that he was starting to get cuter and cuter in my eyes everytime he was over. Summer came by and my sister's graduation party was being thrown. Do you know that feeling when that person walks into the room and you know you just can't be without them near you ? Because that was my feeling constantly after that night it was this feeling I couldn't get rid off. That night really turned everything around for us. I remember getting my new phone and then I called myself off his phone to hear my barbie girl ringback tone. He promised me that night he was gonna teach me how to skateboard... even though he never did. We texted that whole night.

Everything was ruined during my first day of volleyball practice over summer and I found out that Chris had a girlfriend I was so upset. Only for the reason that he never told me he just let me think that he didn't, until I asked him who she was. So I tried to move past that I started to have a crush on this guy on the first day of school. By this time Chris had already broken up with his girlfriend. The first week of school Chris texted my best friend Briana and asked her who I liked. She told him I liked him a little and then I got a text that night from him telling me he liked me and I told him I did too.... kinda. haha. 

The one day I remember so well is the night he was spending the night and my brother fell asleep and Chris, my mom and I were watching a show about a mentally disabled boy, which really touched me. As I was walking back from brushing my teeth I was on the phone and I kinda got lost in his eyes that night knowing I wanted to kiss him so bad. I was so glad to know he did too. He kissed me that night, not just a kiss that didn't mean anything it was like a kiss with so much behind it, 2 people from completely different worlds, it felt right. Not because it was my first kiss, but just because it was with him. 

We always use to say forever & ever babe to each other because our relationship wasn't gonna go to be boyfriend girlfriend stuff until my parents were okay with it but now we are just friends for right now because things were really messed up when school started and everything, but I definitely know that it will happen one day because that feeling I got that night I haven't got with any of the other guys I went out with. There was something different and unique about him something that will never leave my heart. I know he's always going to be there for me no matter if its as a "boyfriend" or as a "friend" he's one amazing kid and yes, My first Love.

SO i'm

in my room thinking about the blog Mr. Thompson wants us to write about soon. I'm not really sure who to consider my first love so I need some help from the "readers." Anyways should I write about my 1st-4th grade crush A little about him his name was ricky. He was so cute and the best thing that happened is on day it was raining and he held my hand and said lets get inside its cold. :) Or my 7th-8th grade crush....wait, actually I crossed him off my list hahah he was a player and I don't remember much about him. Or number 2, my 8th-10th grade crush his name is Chris and We're just friends now but he was my first kiss and my first guy I really really liked. Answers please thank you bloggers :)

My best friends :)

Best friends are Definitely amazing . I Have about 8 best friends you might think thats a lot but it doesn't count as 8 because 4 I met at the same time the other 2 also and the other 2 same thing. So ya its more like 3 best friends anyways they are all really amazing people always keeping me happy and making me laugh. I love them with all my heart . <3 They know who they are ~

Friday

After I got my braces off I had a long 4 1/2 hour trip to the dentist which I really hated. My ortho saw a problem with my cap my gum started to grow over a same section of the back of my tooth producing a small tiny black hole in my tooth in other words a cavity. (First one in my life.) They though it was little until they got to the center of my tooth and realized I had a black hole in side. They gave me three shots and sat me down for a long surgical procedure on my tooth. Then they told me in 6 weeks they will take my pulp cap off and provide the real seal only if the tooth has healed correctly and they placed a pope cap on it and said if it doesn't heal correctly I will be getting a root canal. So I am definitely scared since it was'n my fault the cap was blocking me from brushing my tooth in the back.